I am sorry that I keep bringing you back in time, but there are some things that I really should cover that have happened. Also, we all know that we can understand things better after we have had time to reflect upon them. So without further ado, the blog.
On this day I was invited to attend a class with the Brothers at the Holy Cross Center where I live. All the Brothers in temporary vows were there including the Brothers staying at St. Augustine’s College in Cape Coast. Br. Paul Mensah, the District Superior, started things off with a short discussion about the general dynamics of the community life, more specifically the community of Brothers. We tossed around a lot of ideas. Words like transparency, communication, support, acceptance, empathy, prayer, commitment, and respect. We kept coming back to respect. Over and over we arrived back at that word.
The question before us was how can you respect someone if you do not respect yourself? And if you do not truly respect others than how can you live in a stable mission driven community? The bottom line is in order to truly respect others, to accept them as who they are as continuously evolving human beings, you must first become aware of yourself. You must accept yourself and love yourself for who you are before you can move forward in community life. It seems like a very simple concept, but at the same time what a challenge it really is. Accept who you are. So often in life we compare ourselves to the person next to us and upon finding differences we see ourselves as lacking something rather than just respecting the difference.
It is because we so often fail in respecting the differences of others, of our fellow man, that we turn life into a confusing and intimidating mess. Our minds become so clouded with insecurities, fear, and eventually anger that we miss the beauty in our humanity. If we could just realize that while respecting our differences we can still work together and make something of this life things would be much simpler. Of course, this is the whole idea of a religious community and positive results of the presence of these communities can be seen all across the world.
It is almost funny to think that this deep topic that yields much talk is at the very root of such a humble and easy-going community of Brothers. Truly, it is wonderful. Our discussion was cut short by the arrival of our second lecturer Fr. John Gansa S.J.
He was going to address the topic of Prayer Life and Spiritual Growth. How delightfully appropriate for the one American lay person who often struggles with his prayer life to be present in that room at that very moment. (Coincidence I think not.)
The main question we put before ourselves was if we could track spiritual growth. Fr. John presented us with a model of friendship used to track spiritual growth developed by Fr. William A. Barry S.J. When one looks at their relationship with God as a friendship then it can be easily understood. In order for the relationship to thrive it must follow the same rules as any other friendship. It must be nourished through a strong and consistent life of prayer, just like with a friend you must communicate with them regularly to show that you care. Now of course communication includes listening, and how often do we LISTEN to God? We talk and we talk, but often times we forget to listen for His reply. Think also of the rules of disclosure that we follow in our own friendships. The better you know the person the more you reveal to that person. The more you entrust to God the more He shall reveal to you. It is important to remember that all of this is done through prayer.
Next we further examined the model of friendship using three factors: companionship with Jesus, companionship with others, and apostolic commitment. By constructing a simple line and on the left end was written cold, distant, highly stylized and on the right end mystical union with God we were able to cover many of the different types of relationships that people have with God. This spectrum is another tool one can use to figure out where they are in their spiritual growth but only after assessing these three factors.
So the first one we discussed was the companionship with Jesus. When we learn that Jesus loves us even when we sin we are attracted to Him. We want to learn more and become closer to Him. As you become closer you have to nourish the relationship through consistent prayer. You must ask yourself if you truly believe in the power of prayer? Do you communicate openly with Christ and do you listen to Him? Do you listen to Him when he calls you to move forward, to follow?
The next factor is companionship with others. Here is where the real challenges begin. Everything always seems perfect in our minds until we have to go an deal with people. Things are always more difficult when they involve other people, but what would life be worth if we didn’t interact and work together? So this is when your relationship with God through Christ must be strengthened for to stay close to God in our world means taking the road less traveled. It takes a lot of work to stay strong and keep hope alive in our world. It is easy to be pulled away from God in life when interacting with others in daily life, but if you are able to continuously strengthen your relationship with God you can pull others towards Him instead. (I am realizing right now how I am really cutting this short and am missing a lot of important information, but I hope that you will forgive me for doing so.)
The last factor we discussed was apostolic commitment. When your friendship with God through Christ becomes so strong that it transforms you, you know that it is something that must be shared with the world. God can do great things through us, things we never thought we were capable of. You will realize that what God has done for you is truly wonderful, but it only happened because you opened yourself up completely to Him. You are ever conscious of the presence of God in your daily life. With this knowledge you will desire to engage the world and through your efforts attempt to transform those living in it, or at least open them up to the idea of being transformed by the power of God’s friendship. You will allow God to touch the lives of others through you.
Of course, most of us will never get to the right end of the spectrum of spiritual growth, a mystical union with God. I see that as being so involved in your friendship with God that it is no longer your life that you are living, but God living through you, aka sainthood. Even though we may never reach that union with God, what a beautiful struggle it really is to fight to bring yourself closer to God. I don’t think there is anything else more wonderful in this world to work towards. The whole discussion really put things in perspective for me. Even though times are tough and we get discouraged in our apostolic work, we can always continue if we trust in our friendship with God. It isn’t supposed to be easy!!!!!
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